Pak Tota

This may be the first time I make note about my lecturer in ITB. Pak Tota is one of the many lecturers who leave a long lasting impression on me. It was started about 3 years ago when I first got his course "Cost Estimation" and later failed his class. This note though is not intended for me to nag about his course but what I have learned from his teaching style.

The largest question mark that has been lingering for me from the moment I entered ITB was what is it that ITB has to offer for me?

1st year in ITB is a preparation phase. We called it TPB (Tahap Persiapan Bersama). For me it was just another extension of high school and it was both uninspiring and emotionally draining. I spent 4-years of high school that normally only took 3 years due to Exchange Student experience to USA.

In High School, I suspect that I did not have both the awareness to learn and interest to learn about the subject systematically and comprehensively. As a result, by the time I graduate I barely master the curriculum intended for me. However, I master just enough pre-requisite and basics to let me pass University Entrance Exam. On a larger perspective though, I did not truly master the subjects so it was only natural that I feel burdened when I have to undergo another year doing basically another High School year in ITB.

Long story short, I passed TPB year (freshmen year) and I still have got the mentality that ITB is just another education institution filled by brilliant student with no exceptional comment on lecturer. In retrospect it may sound arrogant, I seriously thought then to succeed and graduate from ITB one only need to make sure to study hard by themselves and classroom offers very little added value.

One of the core-value I subscribed then was an aversion towards competition. I was pretty much disgusted and got worn out from living a competitive environment. So it is pretty much make sense why I hated a lot of aspect in ITB that I thought embodied and emit a strong smell of competition.

I did not thought of it without any basis, I got accepted in FTI (Faculty of Industrial Technology) which was known to be quite competitive. I felt alienated by how people got motivated from competition when I got demoted by it. One major -the Chemical Engineering was particularly known to be very competitive to the point that their scoring system adopt normal distribution, so no matter how high you scored on exam you may still failed if you perform relatively bad from others. A competition. A very filthy one.

To avoid those competitive major, I decided to major in Engineering Management and hoping I will get inspired there. The first impression is actually not bad: MRI or Manajemen Rekayasa Industri is a very fascinating and growing field. However, to truly get what my major is about it took me almost 3 years. So it is safe to say that I don't know anything when I decide to take MRI as my major.

the 2nd-year in ITB: I start to learn introductory class like statistics, quantitative methods, and economics. With my background (I am more interested in a bigger picture not technical details) it is harder for me to understand the essence behind the 2nd year curriculum. I particularly feel difficult to understand quantitative based course such as statistics, calculus, and quantitative methods. I was greatly uninspired every time I got quantitative subject.

One of the major challenge for me is a course called Cost Estimation. I never learned economics before so naturally I feel a lot of concept there as too unfamiliar. What really displeased me was that the course was so technical and it really distract me from the need to understand a framework first. So pretty much I was disoriented and unmotivated learning cost estimation.

I had particularly strong displeasure with the lecturer then, Pak Tota. I thought that he was uninspiring and only taught everything by the book. Furthermore, He barely cover each concept as he discuss a very general thing and does not bother with the specific.

For example: one of the concept we learn was about principle of labor analysis in which we learn about time-study analysis, work sampling analysis, and labor-hour report among other things. at the time, he only cover time-study in a greater depth since that's what it's like in our textbook but did not discuss work sampling methodology in a good enough depth to complete my particularly puzzled mind. The whole course basically give me constant shock as each lecture offer a very new concept which I found hard to understand by relying only his explanation.

Second issue was when I got my first exam. I improvised my answer in several questions since I don't do things by the book. In the end, I wasn't credited for my answer for the reason that it did not match the standard answer as available by the lecture slide. I was upset and asking myself, how could I grow if I only do things by the book? what would be so different between going to his class and only read the book then?

In conclusion, I re-affirm that I have litte respect to Pak Tota's style. Other lecturer turn out to give me pretty much similar impression and I felt my 2nd year in ITB as generally uninteresting.

However, 2 years later. Things suddenly makes sense. As my comprehension towards my own curriculum increases, each course does not seem as random to me anymore. I actually understand how each course fits in a larger framework of my discipline. And only now I started to comprehend why did Pak Tota decide to teach his own style: teach things by the book.

Ultimately, I grow a lot of respect to Pak Tota because one simple awakening: College education never intends to deliver everything to your mouth rather lecturer guides you to the fountain of knowledge and let you take as much of it on your own discretion.

Pak Tota remined me clearly back then in 2nd year that in ITB, study is not lecturer responsibility but my responsibility. I did not respect it then because I though as a consumer of ITB education, I should be prioritized. By 4th year, I understand that lecturer in ITB almost always have better things to do: project, taking care of company, doing research, learn from other top-notch university, etc. I only realized now that for so long, I have been taught by very excellent individual with a very unique background and capability to offer a very rare insight to us.

I realized now that the only reason I failed to appreciate Pak Tota was not because he's bad but because I was not ready and understood enough to be able to absorb his wisdom at the right pace. It's like I listen to Joshua Bell in a subway and did not understand what he plays.

Now, I start to fall in love again with ITB. Education here is precious not necessarily because of the classroom experience. ITB is valuable because it is filled by precious individuals (potential colleague, potential collaborators) and here, the environment is ready to accommodate you to grow at your own pace. Pak Tota helps me understand that the accountability to my study can never be transferred to anyone but me. He once said: "That's the reason why graduating from this school is so satisfying, because you earned it. You deserved it. No matter your grades, if you graduate from here: it is a reflection of your efforts here."

Thanks Pak Tota for your wisdom.